i'm tired,sick if everything. that feeling that i once had is back,right back.seen it coming but didn't knew it would be so soon. i might be very stubborn & selfish,but you all forced me to it. don't push me any further,i'll just snap. leave me alone,let me be left aside.
i just want to the person regarding in the conversation below,sorry. not because of i'm wrong but because that my words were harsh though it was how i felt.
Reb says
im sorry if I made you feel unfair.. I apologise. Your dad loves and dotes on you alot. I hope you see his effort too. Sorry.
chlovelle, says
forget it,pointless to say anything now. what happen alrd happened. that feeling is there, everything is happening now.
Reb says
you're his flesh. it hurts him to scold you. it hurts him to see you cry.
chlovelle, says
i don't like it yet i have to go through it, my dad behaving like .. , no words to describe it. my ex boyf confiding in me about other girl when i still cant forget him.my studies,moodless to do anything. my sister lied to my mum,gotten a scolding & crying to me. wth is going on?. i breaking down sooner or later,i have got my limit.
Reb says
There's no comfort forever. Humans have to experience certain circumstances.
Reb says
If you talk to your Dad about all these, he'll definitely listen. Believe me. I'm willing to lend my listening ear to you too, but it all depends on yourself. Depends whether you wanna grow up..
chlovelle, says
i don't want to talk to anyone about anything anymore,
Reb says
Do you know how much it hurts to keep things to yourself..
chlovelle, says
that trust i s gone.
Reb says
I understand how much it hurts.
chlovelle, says
i assure you i won't let out my trueself to both of you anymore. i'm forced to it,don't blame me.
Reb says
Never see things based on their outward appearances.. thats what I want you to understand.
chlovelle, says
everything changd,so do i.
Reb says
Im not your biological mum nor am I very very very close to you, but long ago I've told myself must dote and love you.
chlovelle, says
changed*
Reb says
If you are not going to help yourself, nobody cn help you. you ought to love yourself before loving others. you keep things to yourself, suffer yourself. How are you to love yourself?
chlovelle, says
i won't,maybe i changed to being more rebelious,i don't know.
Reb says
i once was a rebellious girl too. it didnt do me any good.
chlovelle, says
be it you all want to say that i changed to being more rebelious but i'll not open my freaking mouth to any of you anymore unless necessary.
Reb says
i dont care if you wanna listen. I dont know if i sound fierce or.. I want you to know and PLEASE UNDERSTAND your DAD loves you. REALLY ALOT. He's willing to even sacrifice ... just for your sake. MANY PEOPLE LOVES YOU , but you often see whats on the outside and neglect what has been done for you thats being hidden. The only kindest and good thing, was to do good things and not letting it be known.
chlovelle, says
fierce all you want,from the very first time my dad scold me,i seen a few more times coming.
Reb says
You have a limit to your patience, so do him..
chlovelle, says
the 3rd time,i knew i'm used to it,and i would just cry & everything would be fine.
Reb says
You are his flesh. You're still young. Scoldings is to ensure you grow up.. Who doesn't get scolded Compared to others, you're lucky.
chlovelle, says
i thought he would be diff from any single parents,forget it.
Reb says
At least you don't get beaten by him.
chlovelle, says
it's all the same, beat me? trust me,it'll come one fine day.
Reb says
Have faith. He won't hit you.
chlovelle, says
believe me,he'll & i'll changed even more, till you cant imagine. just like what happen at my mum's place.
Reb says
I hope you'll think about this when you're relaxed. at your mum's place? nobody wants to see each other's black faces. Everyone wants their family to be happy always. I hope tonight you'll be frank to me with your feelings. I will keep my mouth shut. And erase everything tonight.
chlovelle, says
it's the truth now. you can jolly well tell that to him, my limit alrd reached that very maximum further more i'll just snap
Reb says
you're still young. In future when you have your own kids, by that time you'll regret for doing so.
chlovelle, says
keep quiet is all i'll do.
Reb says
you're just stressed. and there's nothing and no one there for you. You feel as if you're going to break down soon. I've been thru it many times.
chlovelle, says
you're not me,don't try to read me,you won't be able to at times.
Reb says
At least I try..
chlovelle, says
i neh regret what i do,
Reb says
I won't give up even if the largest rock falls on me.
chlovelle, says
when everyone said that i'll regret leaving my mum's place i said i won't, till this veh moment i didn't. i'll give up, i'm not you.
Reb says
you're weak. do you know?
chlovelle, says
perhaps i'm
Reb says
I don't know how to communicate nor talk to you so you would understand. though we're only 2years apart.
chlovelle, says
there's this big wall between us which can never be demolished. demolish*
Reb says
I hope you'll be frank, are you unhappy because you feel that your dad treats me better than you? Big wall?
chlovelle, says
idk,i feel that he changed, but no matter what's gonna happen now,i won't be bothered anymore.
Reb says
Yes, you are unhappy.
chlovelle, says
even he's gonnna treat me better, i won't be a little bothered.
Reb says
Do you know that you're selfish too. Your dad loves you alot. You don't see his love. You just see yourself burning up in anger...
chlovelle, says
i'll just do my part,study all i can. do me stuffs. maybe i am. but that's me,like it or not,it's me. cause nobody appreciate those changes i tried to make. so why bother to change alrd.
Reb says
Who failed to appreciate.. Your dad knows whatever things that you've done do you know. You dont need anyone to appreciate. you change because you ought to.
chlovelle,
says be it,i'm not interested anymore.
Reb says
you change because its all for yr own good
chlovelle,
says that's your thinking. to me,i think that if i change & people still keep saying i neh change & i'll stop
Reb says
thats being stubborn.. chlovelle, says that's it. stubborn,selffish, whatever,it's me. Reb says WAIT. WAIT TILL YOU GROW UP, YOU'LL REGRET FOR TREATING YOUR DAD THIS WAY.
chlovelle,
says enough,i won't want to lose my temper to you.
Reb says
You dont need to have any returns in order to treat a person gd. no. i dont mind. i'd rather you &your dad throw ur temper on me. rather than to see you both quarrelling feel like helping but yet matter would get worse
chlovelle, says
stop trying to be so noble,it won't get you anywhere better,your effort won't be appreciated. maybe he'll but i won't.
Reb says
noble?
chlovelle, says
you get it?
Reb says
Why would I want to.
chlovelle, says
just don't be good to me. you won't get repays
Reb says
i dont ask for anything. If I asked for anything in return, I would have in the past. I neednt wait till now.
chlovelle,
says just stop it,don't bother telling things alrd,i don't wish to know. i don't wish to change. i just want to be alone, at the very least i won't cry.
Reb says
Want to change or not is not your decision. I rmb the pastor said, change or not is a matter of time. Depends whether you wanna change. Cos YOU OUGHT TO CHANGE. In the future you will change..
chlovelle, says
i'm afraid of fall,hurts & crying,and the only way to prevent it, is to be alone.
Reb says
you are wrong.
chlovelle, says
i'm not.
Reb says
being alone hurts much more. you cnt even have laughters to hide your emotions
i'm sorry,that's it.
nobody knows what i'm going through now,
don't push me,i'm breaking down.
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